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The Courage It Takes

2024-01-22 (월) Roanne Jubee Lee North Hollywood High School / 11th gra
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The Courage It Takes

Roanne Jubee Lee North Hollywood High School / 11th grade

A couple of months ago, I had the honor to make a speech on TEDx through my high school. I still remember the first time I heard about the event on campus; it’s a show I’ve been watching on TV, and I couldn’t believe that our school was collaborating with TEDx. As soon as I read the post on the wall, my heart started to thump quite nervously with excitement. Was I subconsciously wanting to audition for it? As I walked away, I put on a very calm look with a question in my mind.

I doubt anyone around me cared, but I tried to hide the excitement because I knew I didn’t have a chance. I didn’t have the confidence to even audition. Also, I was already afraid that all my classmates would be utterly shocked to find out that Roanne, a shy, quiet Korean American girl, would be on stage for TEDx. My head was full of imagination and overthinking, but all I knew at the moment was that I would never have the guts to try out.

Two weeks fast forward, a day into the week of auditioning, I quietly revisited the post to learn more about the details: the theme was going to be on “Treasure Hunt.” Perhaps I was too focused on the big name of “TEDx Talks” that I didn’t bother to look more deeply into the whole event. After finding out about the theme, I was already uttering to myself about what my treasure was. I knew what my treasure was. A sudden urge rushed to audition for the talk because I wanted to talk about it. I wanted to share my story to inspire and encourage others.


But there was a problem. A day had already passed since the audition started, and the sign-up was due a week before. I was devastated, and regretted not being more courageous. But I couldn’t give up…not yet. I went into the online form and read through all the instructions. After reading through for anything that could possibly allow me to sign up, one line read: “If you desire to audition even after the form due date has passed, you can fill in your information, and we will contact you if a spot for auditioning opens.” “Yippeee!!” It wasn’t a confirmation, but there was still a chance. I quickly signed up, and a few days later, I received a message that a spot opened up. They asked me if I wanted to take the spot to audition on the last day of the audition week, and I answered “Yes!” without hesitation.

With a click on “send,” my worries began, and fears rushed in again. I had only three days to prepare the speech. I started to panic but I had to quickly get myself together. I began typing out my words. Word after word, I kept going. The typing happened so smoothly. It was something I had not experienced before. It was a joy to write about what I love, my treasure hunt, and my treasure itself. I continued to write, edit, erase, re-write. I pestered anyone who could help me finish my speech in perfection: my brother-in-law and two older sisters.

I practiced my speech over and over again for three days. After continuous editing, pestering family members, and verbalizing my speech, the day had come. I wasn’t nervous. Perhaps, I was super excited to share my speech in front of the judges. The shy-older-me who never had the courage to speak publicly was no longer there.

This time, it wasn’t just speaking publicly for me. Even if I didn’t pass the audition, it was still a chance for me to share my treasure in front of three other people. I really wanted that because I wanted to encourage others with my treasure. I entered the audition room with skippy steps and an excited heart. With a huge smile on my face, I began speaking.

After my speech ended, I looked at the faces of the judges, and they gave a big round of cheerful applause. Immediately, I knew I did the right thing in taking this chance to audition. I came back home and just waited for the email. Though this opportunity to audition was good enough for me, I was still hopeful for me to pass. “Maybe…just maybe…” “Ding!” I got a notification that an email had been sent to me. My heart started to beat faster and faster until I got my finger to finally click open my emails. “Congratulations!” I couldn’t believe my eyes. I started screaming and jumping with joy. I ran all the way to my mother’s room to tell her the news, and together we hugged and jumped and screamed with happiness. She was excited to see how much I had grown to overcome all my fears. I couldn’t hide my excitement and couldn’t wait until I shared my story in front of people like myself. I wanted to inspire and encourage those who have gone through the same experiences as I have and perhaps help them through by sharing my personal story.

I will never regret the choices I made in these moments. The courage it took for me to even sign up for the auditions was something unexpected of me, but challenging in a good way. The past-Roanne would have never imagined herself deliberately taking the chance to stand up and speak in public. But I took the risk, and I mustered up the little courage I had. This experience helped me to grow into someone who can take challenges and try something new. I realize now that challenges are not meant to be easy, but there is always a lesson to learn, because I am constantly changing, growing, and asking. This irreplaceable experience will always be something I revisit whenever I need a reminder that nothing is impossible, and I can do it.

<Roanne Jubee Lee North Hollywood High School / 11th gra>

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